If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a million times. It’s the question that family, friends, and society pose every May. What do moms really want for Mother’s Day? Depending on the mom you ask, or even when you ask them, the answer will vary.
Breakfast in bed? Brunch with your family followed by visits with her mom and your mom? Flowers, handmade crafts, and a million pictures to memorialize how much you appreciate Mom on her special day? While all of these options might seem like the perfect fit (or at least what usually happens), is this really what moms want for Mother’s Day–more importantly, is it really what they need?
Even though it’s supposed to be a fun, enjoyable day with love, laughter, and relaxation, somehow, Mother’s Day still ends up being stressful. And if you’re a mom who has a complicated (or non-existent) relationship with your mom, or you’re a mother who has lost a child, the day can come with some very complex and overwhelming emotions.
No matter how you’re celebrating Mother’s Day this year, take time to be mindful of how you’re spending your time and make sure to make time for self-care as well. And for those who are planning the celebrations to commemorate this special day, encourage the mom you’re celebrating to take the lead and guide the day.
Mindfulness
Feel all the feelings
Just because Hallmark markets the day as all sunshine and rainbows, it doesn’t mean that realistically it will feel that way. And yes, there will be plenty of picture-perfect posts on all your social media channels, but remember, you’re only seeing a snapshot of someone’s day.
If you’re dealing with hard emotions like grief, or are angry, or sad, allow yourself to acknowledge and sit with them. Pushing these feeling down or trying to ignore them isn’t a strategy that will serve you. So give yourself the time and space to process.
Give yourself grace
Part of that process might be having a good cry. Or it might mean taking some time to yourself just to breathe, and that’s okay. Don’t feel like you have to over-schdule the day, and instead focus on yourself. You aren’t letting anyone down by taking care of yourself and your emotional needs.
Self-Care
Taking care of yourself, allows you to be a better caretaker to those you love. On a day when it’s supposed to be all about you, make sure to do what brings you peace. Being a mom doesn’t mean that you only live and exist for your children and family. You’re still an individual person with emotional, mental, and physical needs of your own.
Whether it’s journaling, walking, enjoying a bubble bath, or listening to your favorite playlist, engage in activities that leave you feeling content and relaxed. Practicing self-care on Mother’s Day is a great place to start, but it is an act of self-love you should add to your regularly scheduled program.
So when the question is asked, what do moms really want for Mother’s Day, instead of assuming you know, just take the time to ask. Don’t only focus on things you can buy them or plans you can make for them, ask what they need to enhance their calm. If they choose to be surrounded by family at brunch, celebrate with them, but if they opt for some alone time to be mindful and engage in self-care, don’t take it personally– because this choice is equally valid too.
Our therapists here at Let’s Talk Psychological Wellness are committed to helping you process grief and use healthy strategies to cope with difficult moments. Learn how to make self-care and mindfulness part of your everyday routine. Call, text, or email us.
If you liked this topic, you’ll also enjoy reading about:
5 Ways to Improve Communication in Relationships
If you found value in this article, consider sharing it on your favorite platform and tag us!